Practices aren’t always butter smooth and easy. Our body is in such a constantly fluctuating state, some days we feel butter smooth, some days we feel energised, other days we feel void, exhausted.
Today my practice felt like a real challenge, body heavy, wrists weak and I could feel the acid build up. The first half hour of the practice was pure unenjoyment. But as I worked my way through my body’s resistance, it started to feed back to me, it started to open up and things started to change. Through the intensity my hands started to shake, and through the trembling my muscles started to find strength, it started to find space, it started to find the breeze of energy flowing through again.
And then I thought to myself, I had thought about given up half way, I had thought otherwise about getting on my mat today. As my hands were trembling, my whole arm and shoulders shaking, I thought this was not the day for my active practice.
But things we prefer doing aren’t always what is necessary, what we don’t want to do aren’t always what we should avoid.
When we are confronted with flavours we don’t like, sensations we are not familiar with, our minds creates fear, and this fear stops us from experiencing the full spectrum of other sensations, it stops us from being. It is only when we face and run towards feeling and digesting this fear, this discomfort, do we understand and fully synthesise the learnings from the ancient, fluid intelligence of our body.