The biggest enemy is your expectations

It’s been about a month now that I’ve engaged in a daily handstand tuck practice.
In full disclosure I cannot do a handstand without the wall. But being my daily extra this month I’ve employed my loyal husband to help me. We do one to two jumps everyday, he catches me and I see how long I can hold it up for with him assisting my balance. And through this I’ve observed a few things. One being, of course your balance changes everyday. It seems to, to me also varies on what I have been practicing as my main practice that day. I could swear if I had had a shoulder focus practice, I had way more stability in the stand.
One thing that is beyond any practices, any tips that I’ve read that day, whether or not I’m tired. Is that I do WAY better when I have the least expectations. Case in point I realise I could do a mayurasana for the first time yesterday, in the midst of me messing around and getting a feel for my body before teaching. As I was warming my wrists, it came to me that I should try. And right there and then, a pose that I have been wishing and attempting to do for three years (I kid you not, it is literally on my bucket list) suddenly made sense to me for the very first time. It wasn’t all the tips that I’ve read, the tutorials that I’ve watched, the workshops that I’ve attending that helped me, I reckon. It is the blank of the mind and the going for nothing that got me there. It is the lack of expectations and whispering thoughts of how to pose, what shape to hold that got me there. It is the freedom my body was allowed to have without my brains interference that got me there.

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