Im present again. And it took the oldest, most obvious trick in the book: practice.
I don’t know how it happened, but I hadn’t been practicing enough again. Other things in life takes over, and the inertia of rather doing nothing becomes a more permanent state.
And the result is transparent. I didn’t have inspirations to how to teach. Without the input that I feed the intelligence of my body, my intelligence doesn’t know how to teach. Mechanically yes, but honestly, energetically no.
As soon as I started making a daily practice to hit the mat again every thing changed. Maybe ta the challenge that I provide myself but I tend to think it’s more of a sensational thing. My favourite thing to do in my own practice is to systematically squeeze all the muscles, all the cells that I can think of. And experience that ecstasy of little bubbles of vibration simmering open. Time and time again, my body has shown me that if I’m not feeling my own simmer of energy, I don’t have the ability of teach what I deem a genuinely great class. And the difference between a great and a good class, is all it matters to me.
So I’m practicing daily again. Sometimes it’s 20’inutes, sometimes it’s an hour, sometimes it’s 3 hours. And what matters is, and always will be, is the consistent arrival at this place.